I Am A Woman With A Reputation (Luke 7:36-58)

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

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I am drawn to women’s stories –

in their own voices,

about their own lives,

telling their own experiences.

I am drawn to women’s stories –

Women from around the world,

across cultures,

traditions,

ages,

time,

and space.

I am drawn to women’s passionate,

powerful,

principled,

persistence,

Women’s trials,

and women’s triumphs.

I am drawn to women’s stories –

who tells them,

in what voice,

and for what purpose.

In the stories of women,

I find solidarity –

of expectation,

experience,

expression.

And I find hope.

This is especially true

when it comes 

to biblical women,

and I am eager

to elevate

and imagine 

the stories

of biblical women

in ways that 

might draw us 

more profoundly

into their own voices –

rather than

into the 

voices,

perspectives,

and opinions 

of the men

who wrote about them.

If,

for example,

the woman

who anointed Jesus’ feet

could speak for herself,

what would she say?

How 

would she

tell her own story?

What follows,

is my imagination

of this woman

in her own voice

in her own words

telling

her story

on her terms.

And yes,

perhaps,

at least to some extent –

she is me

and I am her

and 

some universal 

something 

of everywoman

is woven

in the way

the threads

of her story

come to life

through my imagination.

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I am a woman with a reputation

It goes before me

And behind me

And beside me

And beneath me

It precedes me like an acid incense -

Burning shame -

That is my fame

Full of blame 

For a life that is lived

Past tense –

Looking back

Rearview mirror

Stumbling forward

Falling down

With nowhere to go

My burden of woe

Continues to grow

As they think they know

What has made me 

So

I am 

Judged for

What I’ve done

Who I’ve been

Where I’ve gone

Who I’ve known

With their words

And their looks

And their whispers

And their sneers 

They throw stones

That cut me to the bone.

I am a woman with a reputation

I live a story 

I didn’t write

Though I might

Have

I don’t know -

But this is true

I want to be through

With this life that

Keeps me 

On the outside

Dirty

And within

I don’t want it anymore

I abhor

Who they think

I am

And make me out to be

What they see

Is that me?

I cannot take it

Or shake it

Or make it go away -

Everyday

I pay

For 

What

Clings like glue

From you 

To my skin

I cannot win

I am sin

-Or so they say.

I am a woman with a reputation

I can make no recompense

For this pain so intense

I don’t mean to make offense 

But my sorrow is immense

And my despair 

trails me like 

Death’s own shadow

Even though 

I don’t know

How to say it

Or make them get it

Or believe it

Or dare 

To care that

My soul needs repair -

But all they see

Is a woman with a reputation -

In this nation

That is my station

Of damnation

But I have heard

That there is One

Who has a reputation

Of salvation

With his words

And with his deeds -

He condemns greed

While he feeds

The hungry 

Starving multitudes

And speaks

Beatitudes

That welcome and include

All who are 

-cast out.

I have heard there is One with a reputation

Who has 

Healed

Bears love unsealed

Sins repealed

From death a shield

God made flesh

Revealed

I have heard there is One who 

Teaches

And preaches 

And reaches

Across boundaries

And barriers

And broken spaces

Showing love in his face

A Bearer of

Grace

In this place

Where disgrace

Shouts unclean

Get away

Don’t be seen

For you have a reputation

In this nation

That is your station 

Of damnation

But he says

-no

Do you see

Pharisee

Her on her knees

It is she

At my feet

With tears

And fears

Amid your jeers

She has kissed me

When you missed me

And dissed me

And hissed 

Your condemnation

When you warned

And scorned

Your countless 

Frustrations

Accusations

Incantations

-of reproach

She persisted

In anointing me

With perfume

That fills this room

With her love

-that is great.

-So stop the hate.

And to me 

There on bended knee

For all to see

This One

With a reputation

Of salvation

When my jar 

Had been broken

And my love

Spoken

With tears

And devotion

Emotion

Raw

On display while the bread was broken

Then

This One 

With a reputation 

Of salvation

Said 

To me

for all to see

-And hear

For you

There is 

No condemnation

No damnation

For your faith has saved you

With a reputation

Now

Rise from your station.

-And. So I. Did.

Forgiven

I am she

That is me

Don’t you see

My jar broken open

Perfumed aroma spoken

Love poured in grace

In that space

From his face

To me 

A sinner

-Set free

Now

This is my narration

A woman with a reputation

Of sins forgiven

Joy

Redemption

Salvation

That is my eternal station.

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