Disabled…I mean, Home for the Holidays!
Photo by Ysaias Martinez on Unsplash
It’s the most wonderful time of the year for most. At the same time, others are caught in a wintery mix of emotions, while navigating our greatest traumas and fears. Many of us sit with the fear of abandonment, the fear of rejection, the fear of judgment, and the fear of lack every year around the holiday season.
In 2019, AAA estimated a record-breaking 115.6 million Americans traveled during the holiday season. This year, we are set to break that record! The CDC is already nervous about the “burden” of the flu due to Covid and its lingering impact. Family members do not always have the compassion and sensitivity to meet the needs of loved ones with chronic conditions of the body and mind. Rather, we get lumped into a one-size-fits all onesie, or Santa hat, or holiday meal.
People in the disability community feel the weight of these realities in an intense way. Often folks with disabilities are forgotten when arrangements are being made, while meals are being carefully crafted and sometimes rendered invisible when it comes to harmful language and dialogue being used amongst family and friends. The holidays can feel like the most broken, most obnoxious, and most triggering time of year. However just as we celebrate joy, peace, and faith during this season…may we also celebrate hope.
Hope is defined in a number of ways:
to cherish a desire with anticipation : to want something to happen or be true
trust
to desire with expectation of obtainment or fulfillment
to expect with confidence : trust
I am praying we lean into a hope this year, where we cherish and desire to be in right relationship with the people around us. A hope that is anchored in a newfound trust in one another. A hope that is rooted in all God’s children living more wholly this season; while in the workplace, enjoying festivities outside or simply kickin’ it at home by the fire.
James Baldwin wrote in a 1962 article, As Much Truth as One Can Bear, “Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.” While those of us in the disability community may not be able to change our conditions, the people who love us can shift their perspective, actions and focus to create more accessible home environments. The more accessible home environments created, the more accessible our communities become. The more accessible our communities become, the more accessible the world becomes. This for me, and so many others living with chronic conditions of the body and mind, would be A Christmas Miracle!
Here are some ways for all of us to stay safe(r) this holiday season:
Remember YOU are the authority on your experience. No one has the right to critique your experience of joy, pain, discomfort or grief.
Practice agency in moments you normally would not. Some of us lose the power of our voices when placed in uncomfortable situations. Not this year!
Have grace for your internal experience AND the experiences of others. Perhaps, they didn’t show up for you as a child because they didn’t know how to show up for themselves. We don’t have to allow abuse anymore, but who can we view with new eyes filled with grace this season?
Take a break. Take a few moments away from the larger group. Take a breather from that heavy conversation. Take a break from the monotonous Christmas tunes. Take a break from your own nervousness around the holidays. Breathe in and take a break!
Let us all, no matter our physical ability, shift our focus to accessibility. Accessibility is how we reach more people with the love of God and the good news that there is in fact room in the Inn. The great news that none of us have to be left out (in the cold) or in subpar conditions because space wasn't prepared for us.
The word nativity is defined as: on the occasion of a person’s birth. What if we transform the “Nativity” scene from an ancient festive occurrence to a modern-day miracle for family and friends? This holiday season let us celebrate the light and life of Jesus by birthing safe(r) spaces for community to gather. Let us become deeply mindful of our words and how we do harm, even when we have everyone’s best interest at heart.
Remember these are holy days, or as I like to think of them, the Wholly Days. The greatest gift may not be peace on earth this year, but rather, keeping peace within.
Sources:
Emma Edmonds, Director of Communications, 2019: AAA Says 115.6 Million Travelers will Break Holiday Records | AAA Newsroom
Definition of Hope: Hope Definition & Meaning - Merriam-Webster
CDC: 2022-2023 U.S. Flu Season: Preliminary In-Season Burden Estimates | CDC
Baldwin Quote: Justice Quote: James A. Baldwin — Justice Innovation Lab
Rev. YaNi Davis
Iyana “YaNi” Davis, is a graduate of Claremont School of Theology with her Masters of Divinity. Rev. YaNi received her B.A. from Spelman College, with an English degree. YaNi has always been passionate about the impact of words, storytelling, truth-telling and the therapeutic nature of writing one’s words and sharing one’s story. YaNi believes firmly in our power as storytellers and sets this example everyday of her life as a coach, creative and community leader. YaNi’s methodology is known as “Wholly Hip-Hop Hermeneutics” and includes the power of Nommo, Black liberation theology and is intermixed with the culture of Hip-Hop!
Rev. YaNi, is a minister with The Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) and has been a featured speaker, poet and teaching-artist around the United States, throughout Europe and across Asia. YaNi uses her words wisely as a Hip Hop artist, an inspiring speaker, an effective educator, a profound poet, a modern day prophet and griot. She has shared the stage with top performers, theologians, creatives, and healers around the world, an honor that she does not take lightly. YaNi is the founder of, My SupaNatural Life, an organization that provides education and wholistic care for people living with disabilities and their caregivers.
YaNi has founded several spiritual communities/churches around the country, is the author of, Love Poems for Peace, is a kidney transplant survivor and near completion of a second masters (Professional Studies-Business of Art and Design) via Maryland Institute College of Art. YaNi is the essence of peace personified!
